I Found Myself in New Orleans
Song of inspiration: Do You Know What It Means To Miss New Orleans
- Louis Armstrong
Hello everyone and welcome back to The Introverted Wanderer! Today, I woke up with an urge to write about how traveling has not only been a dream, but a HUGE part of my life growing up.
I want to title my traveling blog: Booked and Barefoot with Ashley.
Background:
I have been traveling since I was a little girl, going between the South and the Midwest. Time frame of 12-16 hours of driving. I was born in Maywood, IL but moved to Stone Mountain, GA and was raised down there(I do not have a Southern accent). At one point in time, my family and I moved to Tyler, Texas.
Side note:Texas had DRY HEAT and loud, apocalyptic sounding tornado alarms that would scare the crap out of me.
How was school going from state to state? Well, I have attended four elementary schools. One in Stone Mountain, two in Tyler, Texas, and one in Maywood, IL. I attended three different high schools while living in Illinois.
So, my family went from living in Stone Mountain, GA to Tyler, Texas back to Stone Mountain, GA and returning to Maywood, IL. Now, let me clarify, our mobile lifestyle was due to career changes. Now, in my head at the time, I was like…how come no one wanted to get a job in New Orleans? LOL. Let’s be clear, I had no idea about hurricanes and flooding at the time.
Past:
Since I could honestly remember, the very first place that I always wanted to visit was New Orleans, LA. I believe I was in fifth grade when I set on New Orleans being my first destination. At the time, I was always asked, “What’s so interesting about New Orleans?” “What interests you in going to New Orleans?” I heard it over and over and over, and I got to the point where I was tired of being asked those questions with undertones.
I wanted to go to New Orleans to see the Mississippi River, EAT, dance, tour the historical areas, and there was always a part of me that felt…connected to the city.
Unfortunately, as time progressed, I didn’t have that opportunity to visit…yet! After doing a lot of thinking and going back to my memory bank, I realized that I have been in the South more than I’ve been anywhere else. I have been to Memphis, TN; Hilton Head, South Carolina, Huntsville, AL, and Orlando, FL. But I never felt what I had experienced in New Orleans.
Present:
When I think of traveling, I have this beautiful visual and sensation that blooms in me. I have this sense of independence, joy, celebration, and self-exploration.
But when it all came down to it…I realized that my love for traveling was deep rooted. It was an escape and it was my way of discovering myself, learning and appreciating who I am. There was a lot of seeking self acceptance in a world where I had to be a certain person, when in reality…I’ve been wearing a mask for far too long for others.
Future:
I came to terms with this ‘self’ issue when I first went to New Orleans in 2016. It was honestly a HUGE surprise by my parents and I was shocked. I was in complete, utter shock walking through the airport and boarding the plane.
Side note: I was terrified on that plane. LOL. I prayed so hard and so long I fell asleep and when I woke up, I could see the Mississippi River. I put a timer on my cell phone for the hours they said the flight was. I went through a huge anxiety attack, but the excitement overpowered it.
The funniest memory was myself and my siblings exiting the plane, walking through the airport in Kenner, LA and when the airport doors opened…we all went, “DAMN.” That humidity slapped us all in the face and laughed saying, “Welcome!”
Seeing the Superdome was the most emotional part of the trip, because all I could think about was the road we were driving on was probably flooded during Katrina and that same Superdome was ‘shelter’ for so many people.
Visiting New Orleans for THREE days wasn’t enough for what I wanted, deserved, and sought out. But, those three days…those three days taught me something and I am not ashamed to say that I was living life as a character.
While I was in New Orleans (with siblings) I felt so much acceptance within myself, so much originality, and authentic beauty in myself. I had come to realize that I didn’t have to put on a face or portray myself in a certain way. The South has morals that the North/Midwest don’t have. This is not a jab at my Northern/Midwest family/friends, but there’s no facade.
I had so much confidence and reassurance in myself in a totally different city, different region. There was a connection that I felt within myself and the city of New Orleans. I was taken out of the fast paced life and placed in such a smooth, laid back, yet vibrant city that I’d always wanted to travel to.
I truly found myself in New Orleans, my true self, while spending three days in the hot, humid Gulf. I loved it, don’t get me wrong. But, when I say it gets hotter at night! It’s humid beyond all understanding and I was sweating like crazy. I was not trying to be covered in sweat while trying to look cute on crowded Bourbon Street. But I digress.
The New Orleans hospitality was beautiful. I was able to see everyone down there in all shapes, sizes, and more. The people there were moving at a slow, relaxing, easy, stress free notion.
When it was time to go and after praying before our flight back home to Chicago (cause my mama called me at 3 in the morning telling us to pray and there was a storm coming), I realized that I have been living an artificial life in the Midwest. When I say artificial, I mean it as this,
Back home, Midwest, I would never, ever wear my favorite Southern-Chic-Boheme style dresses. I wanted to wear my dresses with my summer fedora hats, and all my bracelets. I wanted to be that woman that was still hiding from the mirror.
I was always embarrassed about how people would look at me-dressed like that. I was bound in my own hometown, but down in New Orleans…I was FREE.
Now, that I have accepted that I didn’t need and don’t need to stick to this status quo of how I need to look.
I may have been born in the Midwest, but I was raised in the South and I strongly believe that remnant has stayed with me and lied dormant for many reasons.
Traveling is not just about getting drunk, hooking up, or creating your own ‘Hangover’ film. I have learned that traveling is best for people who are tired of being bound, conformed, hidden, and lost within themselves. You get out and meet people, see the sites, and experience what living really is.
I found myself in New Orleans 2016 and I plan on going back for the brass bands, the culture…everything that screams “Welcome Back.”
Now I get why Louis Armstrong asked, “Do you know what it means to miss New Orleans?”
I want to ask this,
“Have you ever traveled somewhere, out of state or out of country and realized that you have been living a double life or a caricature of yourself?”
What does traveling do to and for you?
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